Gothic Charm School by Jillian Venters

Author:Jillian Venters
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: HarperCollins
Published: 2009-06-15T16:00:00+00:00

Flirting and dating

Goths, preferring to think of themselves as creatures of dark romance, spend a lot of time wrapped up in flirting or dating. Those two things can be the source of fun, entertainment, and happiness, as well as a lot of angst, tortured internal monologues, and long phone calls or e-mails to close friends. However, that list of woes should not be prompted by glaring lapses in common courtesy by one or both parties. The Lady of the Manners has been shocked—shocked, she tells you—by some of the tales of tragedy that she has seen or heard of over the years.

Flirting is a traditional social activity in the Goth scene, especially at night clubs. However, what one person considers harmless flirting can be construed by another as “I find you very attractive and would like to get to ‘know you better’ in private.” Sitting on people’s laps, excessive touching, or kissing are generally considered to go beyond mere flirtation. If you indulge in this sort of behavior and then claim it “didn’t mean anything,” or, even worse, are confused about the level of companionship someone expects from you, don’t be surprised if that someone gets upset. Of course, context is everything. Perhaps, for example, your social circle is much more casual about smooches and caresses. If that’s the case, try to monitor your behavior when you’re around people outside your usual circle. Don’t feel you have to change your behavior, but be aware that others might interpret it differently. If that happens, don’t feel embarrassed (or angry). Just try to explain.

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